Although not entirely effective, his words did anguish my anger quite a bit. I sighed. “I won’t deny that there’s chemistry between us. But, I’ll be upfront with you, I hate being doubted. I have my morals as well. Since I’ve decided to date you, I won’t get myself involve with other men.”
Strictly speaking, I was still in a friends with benefits relationship with Michael, but I had decided to end it. Moving forward, I would build my own life and so he would simply be my boss at work.
“Anna, that’s a relief to hear. I promise I’ll treat you well,” he said excitedly.
I forced a smile. Although I wished to maintain my relationship with Yuval, that episode just now worsened my impression of him.
I believed that time was the key to solving my current resistance towards him. As long as we go on more dates, I would at some point return his feelings. Yet, believes and actions need not always be aligned. That evening, I found myself finding excuses to turn down his invitation for movies after our dinner.
Back at home, I could not avoid being bombarded with questions from Natalie. It was only after I recounted my whole conversation with Yuval that I was able to retreat back to my room.
Over the next few days, Yuval seemed to be working hard on his promise of treating me well. He was especially proactive and would at least make one phone call a day to check on me.
Even though his actions did not in any way touched me, at the very least I was sure he would make a great marriage partner. Settling down with him was the best choice.
Michael on the other hand had not contacted me since that day. I presumed this signified the end of our relationship.
Just like that, I spent the rest of the next days peacefully. Every day, it was the usual routine of working and calling Yuval. Despite my best efforts, I still felt nothing towards him. And ever since we switched to video calls, he became even more excited.
After spending so much time with him, I was certain he was a mature and dependable man. Despite us dating for some time, he continued to respect my boundaries and did not behave inappropriately. Perhaps due to my past trauma, I found men who got physical early into the relationship, repulsive.
The day before, I found Natalie sat brooding in the living room. She did not even greet me.
I walked over to her side. “What’s wrong?” I hugged one of her arms.
It was rare to see her in this state. She was usually an optimistic and jovial person.
“I suspect John’s not really in love with me.” She looked at me, her expression somber.
Did John really do something to betray her? During my meal with him the other time, I had heard him speaking with another woman on the phone. Although I questioned him, he had reassured me that he only had eyes for Natalie. That was why I did not mention anything to her.
“What made you say this?” I looked at her nervously. If she mentioned anything about him two-timing, that would make me guilty for not telling her about that phone call.
“Anna, if you really love someone, won’t you want to share everything with him? Won’t you want him to understand everything about you?”
Her question made me recalled the foolish me of the past. I was at the beck and call of whatever Justin wanted. It was not an exaggeration to say, I would have even offered him my heart if he so wishes. I hid nothing from him.
I replied seriously, “You’re right. Love means wanting the other party to know everything about you.”
“Since we’ve been dating for some time, I had suggested that we meet his parents. But, John rejected and said it wasn’t the right time yet. I think he’s hiding something from me.”
If John was serious about their relationship, he would have agreed to let Natalie meet his parents. His actions were saying otherwise. Thinking about this only made me angrier.
I thought he would have learned his lesson after I caught him cheating the other time. Seems like I had thought too highly of him. “Natalie, what will you do if he wants to break up with you? Or even worse, what if he’s cheating on you?”
Although it was only a passing thought, I was tempted to tell Natalie what I knew about John. In the end, I decided against it because I was afraid she may not be able to handle the truth.
Despite her boisterous and easygoing attitude, like me, she was not one to accept her partner cheating on her.
“If that really happens, it would be a living hell for me! Anna, does John not love me? Why doesn’t he want me to meet his parents?” Natalie grabbed my hands frantically.
Her question put me on the spot. I knew that John was not serious about her, but the truth would only hurt her.
“Natalie, I think you should focus on work instead. It’s not healthy for you to devote all your energy into a relationship. At the end of the day, if this doesn’t work out, you’ll be the one suffering.” I decided to save this information for the next time after her relationship with John cooled down.
“But what’s the point of a relationship if we don’t give our all? Is that still true love?”
Despite my good intentions, Natalie did not see eye to eye with me on this topic.